Monday, May 15, 2017

Mother's Day:

I hope you mamas had a great day with your families!  Mine started out great...I got to sleep in, was greeted with lots of hugs and kisses when I woke, I got a pretty tulip bouquet and a "Best Mom Ever" crown ;)  It was pretty special!  


Then the morning ended with me in tears in the parking lot of Home Depot.  Let me explain. 

I was gifted manual labor, the gift of getting rid of our hideous front yard witch's cauldron and replacing it with something slightly more appealing to the eye.  We headed to Home Depot in search of items to complete this project and a few other random things.  Adam  was busy in the garden center getting the pavers, mulch, etc, so I took the boys inside to get the miscellaneous items.  "Now, I expect you boys to behave and act politely while we are in the store".  I literally said those exact words.  Fast forward a whole five minutes and they are antagonizing each other, being too loud, hitting each other, and basically doing everything I had just asked them not to do.  I gave them several reminders that they need to be polite and have good behavior, followed by taking away privileges when they did not listen.  Things continued to escalate and I finally had to hold Beckham while pushing Chase who held onto the cart.  When I couldn't take it any more, we went straight to the checkout line, even though I didn't have everything on my list.  As I was checking out, I set B down so I could get my credit card, and the little f***ing punk took off like a rocket.  He ran out of the checkout area and out of my sight.  I ran after him, but I didn't see where he went.  He had 2 choices: back through the main entrance or out into the parking lot.  I panicked.  My heart stopped and my stomach was in my throat.  I ran faster and I tried to look out the glass doors to see if my child was smashed on the pavement.  Just as I was about to make a mad dash outside, I saw his blonde curls around the opposite corner.  He was hiding by the customer service desk.  I wanted so badly to beat the crap out of him and smother him with kisses at the same time.  I was thankful he was safe and unharmed, but boy was I furious.  We immediately went to the car,  I strapped them in their seats, waited for Adam, and then I melted down right there...in the parking lot of Home Depot.  I got my shit together and Adam stayed with the boys in the car while I went back in ALONE and got what I needed. 

I think my expectations for this day of appreciating mothers was maybe a tad unrealistic.  For some reason I thought my children would realize that on this day, they were supposed to behave like angels and not fight or argue with each other.  I thought they'd know to talk politely to me and not sass or roll their eyes.  I thought they would listen and obey my every command.  But this was just like any other day, and yet I found myself getting more frustrated at them then usual, more angry that they weren't doing what I asked. 

A not-so-subtle reminder that motherhood never quits.  You can't take a day off, even on Mother's Day.  Not that I want to quit, I don't!  I love my boys more then life itself, but they are exhausting.  They try my patience.  They push my buttons.  They test all limits, over and over again.  Motherhood is constant.  It's constantly giving answers to questions.  It's constantly reminding them to use their manners.  It's constantly giving them what they need.  It's constantly testing my level of patience. 
But it's also constant love.  Love like I've never experienced before.  Love that is 100% unconditional.  Love that sends me into a panic when my child races out of my sight.  Love that is so deep I can feel it with my whole body and soul.  And for that I am thankful. 


I saw all of these perfect mother/child pictures on social media, and I debated...should I post a perfect picture too?  I really do love them so so much.  Or do I post a real picture of the day...tears streaming down from underneath my sunglasses while I wait for my husband to rescue me.  I didn't post anything.  But I want you to know that if your Mother's Day wasn't how you dreamt it, you are not alone.  Today is another day.  Another day for snuggles and books.  Another day for building forts and digging for worms.  Another chance to be their mom and tell them how much I love them!  







 photo Niki Heart Auto signature-2_zpso77bkiti.png

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